NLP - The Eyes Have It!

I have already told you how listening to the words people say can help you build rapport with them, but there is a lot more to NLP than this.  NLP is a great tool for salespeople – I know; I’ve been there. It worked for me and it can work for you, too. You don’t even have to be in sales to benefit from using NLP. It can improve your communication skills and the way you relate to others, which can lead to all sorts of opportunities opening up for you.

I am going to show you an NLP trick, which is great for public speakers, as you can get an idea of what people are thinking, just by looking at their eyes. This isn’t always a hundred per cent accurate, though, as the results are reversed if a person is left-handed and, if you are stood in front of a room full of strangers, you won’t know which of them are left-handed.

Anyway, here it is…

What the position of someone’s eyes means

 

Eyes looking up and to their left – they are remembering a picture or playing a scene in their head.

Eyes looking up and to their right – they are creating a picture in their head - imagining how something might look.

Eyes looking horizontally to their left—they are remembering a sound/conversation

Eyes looking horizontally to their right – they are imagining a sound in their head.

Eyes looking down and to their right—they are accessing their emotions

Eyes looking down and to their left --- they are indulging in self-talk

 

Now that you know what these mean, you can change your tactics if you are involved in a sales meeting or presentation. If you see everyone’s eyes moving up and to their right (your left) then this could be a sign that your sales pitch is working as the person is most likely picturing the product and how they can use it. If you see then looking up and to their left (your right) then they may be daydreaming and you may consider using another strategy.

I hope this has helped. NLP is a great toolkit for understanding people and improving your communication skills and I would recommend you look into the subject further, if you feel it will benefit you, too. I will be updating this blog with useful posts on NLP, so keep reading!

Love,

Mochira x

NLP Speak

NLP stands for Neuro-Linguistic-Programming. Neuro means the nervous system. linguistic refers to speech and programming refers to changing patterns of thinking.

As an NLP Practitioner, I often help clients change the way they think about things, using NLP techniques. Sometimes it isn't the situation we find ourselves in that is unbearable, it is the way we view the situation. For example, if we are out having a lovely picnic and it pours down with rain, we will start thinking negatively. We will hate the fact that it's decided to rain and ruin our nice day out. We will most likely curse the British weather (if you live in the UK, you will know what I mean!) and moan for the rest of the journey home. If you are a farmer, who has been worrying about his crops for two weeks, you may be dancing for joy!

The above example illustrates how the same event can cause two different reactions depending on how the person sees the situation. NLP can help those of us who struggle to see the positive side of situations.

As well as this, NLP is a useful tool when you want to communicate effectively with someone. It is particularly beneficial for sales people and those who want to build up a rapport with another person. Before I became aware of NLP, my employer sent me on a top sales course. It was very expensive and thought to be the one of the best sales courses in the UK. I learnt a lot on the course and it was only recently, when I qualified as an NLP Practitioner, that I realised most of the units on the course were based on NLP.

Listen carefully...

I am going to let you in on a little secret, used by those who know about NLP. You can build up a rapport with someone and get them on your side, just by listening to the words they use. Then you can match your words to theirs and you'll have more chance of closing a sale.

Visual - if the person says things like ' I see what you mean' or 'Iet's all take a look' or 'my view is'. Each of these phrases shows that the person is a visual person as they use words such as look, view and see.

Auditory - if the person says things like 'I hear what you're saying' or 'keep the noise down!' you will know they are an auditory person and you will work well with this person if you can match the tone, pace and loudness of your voice, to match theirs.

Kinaesthetic - if the person says 'I feel weird about this' or 'let's throw some ideas around' you will do best with this person if you use a lot of actions, gestures and use similar words.

It can be difficult, at first, to match the words of the other person without it looking obvious or contrived; however, with practice it will start to come naturally to you. I got more sales using these techniques than I ever did before, but it isn't just sales that can benefit from these techniques. If you've not been getting on with somebody, it may be because you are a visual person and they are an auditory person, for example. If you can start to match words to build a rapport with them, you may find your communication with this person improves dramatically.

Have fun with it.

 

Love,

Mochira X